Hopes & Wishes tag: 2017

We all know I’m a bit OCD about planning, so this hopes & wishes tag was right up my street. I was tagged by the lovely Sarah who blogs over @ Whimsical Mumblings. Thanks Sarah!

Personal Wishes

 

  • Get healthier: Lose weight / take vitamins / drink more water the whole shebang.
  • To up my self care game: Hair trims / nail care / moisturising – I’m a bit of a slacker in all the above.
  • Be more social: I am an absolute hermit, less so lately actually but I’d like to continue with not being a hermit.
  • Take time to not be mum: I am mum 24/7, I don’t get breaks. And the rare occasion I do, I am decorating the house, or cleaning the house, or doing some sort of thing that I don’t actually enjoy. I want to take time to be ‘Terri’ again. I almost feel selfish when my world doesn’t revolve around my two kiddywinkles 100% of the time. (more to follow..)
  • Be more efficient: I am quite pernickity about housework- I do it, eventually. But I have a habit of doing it all in one go, it would be much easier if I spent some time doing little things each day than doing a weeks worth of laundry at once, or a days worth of dishes at once. 5 x 5 minute jobs throughout the day are more appealing than 25 minutes of cleaning.

 

Blog Wishes

 

  • Blog focus: I want to streamline my blog focus to suit what’s going on in my life – currently that’s my weightloss. So I plan to have a few more posts focussing on that.
  • Instagram: I want to utilise my instagram and use it to attract people to my blog – probably will start posting slimming world meals on there too, cause I like to pretend I can cook sometimes.
  • Personal posts: I seem to not post my rambly / ranty , ‘what I’ve done this week’ posts as often and I’d like to start doing that again.
  • Take part in linkies: I’m still a bit confused on how linkies work – but I’m going to look into them soon and hopefully by the end of the year I’ll have taken part in a few.
  • DA: Domain Authority. I want to increase my domain authority, I don’t normally focus all that well on stats and am happy rambling away 90% of the time, but it has taken me a long time to get it up from zero, so I’ll hopefully have it higher by the end of the year.

 

Family Wishes

 

  • L: I hope that L’s behaviour settles down a bit, he’s been quite crabbit lately and it’s very draining. But as he’s non verbal it’s really difficult to know why, what or if anything is causing it.
  • M: M has seriously impressed me this year. He’s came on leaps and bounds with his school work, long may it continue! He’s a very friendly boy, and I hope his friendships flourish in the coming year. He craves friendships and it’s something he struggles with, as social cues don’t seem to catch on sometimes.
  • Days out: I want to make as many memories as possible. To go out exploring as a family – even if it’s just museum trips or something.
  • Family friends: Or more to the point – mum friends! Really easy to go places when there’s another adult to help shepherd kids when one is being unruly.
  • Big Holiday: I want us to be at least halfway prepared for a holiday to Disneyland (hopefully in 2018 / 2019!) Either Paris or Florida.

    Hopes And Wishes

  • Politics: I hope the coming generations aren’t effected adversely by the crap that’s spoonfed to them by the media. I hope Donald Trump ‘s wall falls on top of him and crushes him to death quits. I also hope Teresa May isn’t Maggie Thatcher 2.0
  • For us: I hope at the end of the year I don’t feel as though I should’ve done more this year.  I hope I stick to my guns and continue to better myself & my kids as much as I can. I hope continue to not let people walk over me, but similarly that I trust people more.

 

I’m very late to the party for this tag, as it was a New year thing. So I’m not tagging anyone. You want to do it? Go right ahead!

What are your hopes and wishes for the year?

Februarys Plans

 

It’s February! Squeeeee, that means the dreaded winter-esque freezing yer but off season is almost over. Who am I kidding.. I’m Scottish it’s perma-winter. Anyway. I’ve decided posting my goals monthly might be a step towards keeping me on track. Don’t want to have to openly  admit I have done shit all to you all so I’ll try to keep this updated each month with new goals and how I got on with the month before’s.

My plans & goals for February

 

Lose half a stone more. Obvious reasons..

Properly food log. This will help with the above – I tend to lack a bit on the logging front, and I want to be honest with myself and have a proper log so I can see how I’m progressing and why.

Give me some me time…   I know what you’re thinking. Single, non working parent with school age children, all I get is me time.. right? Wrong. I spend so much time sorting out bills, sorting out appointments, cleaning the house, upkeeping the house, looking after the animals, shopping, cooking, blogging, planning meals.. I want to go sit in starbucks or even the cafe in fucking asda once in a while and have a bleedin coffee..(I don’t even like coffee) Little steps guys, little steps.

Get round to reading some more of Marie Kondo’s book. The principle of her book is basically what I base most of my cleaning around now.. I really should finish it. It’s a fab book.

Think about booking the boys birthday party. Their birthday is in July, I want to look into the best halls and things – as both of them have friends with different needs (both in special units at primary schools) I need one that will suit everyone. So I’d like to at least have an idea of what I want and where.

Look into a break away for summer. Even if it’s local, even if it’s over a weekend and involves a lot of driving. I really can’t be arsed going anywhere other than the UK if I’m honest, but I don’t want to go to a busy place unless it’s super kid friendly and the boys will love it.

I think that’ll do for now.. What are your plans for February?

THE (NOT BIG OR FAT) QUIZ OF THE YEAR

2017! The year for changes right? (Until next year of course! 😉 ) The lovely Kayleigh from Little B & Me has tagged me to answer questions from her blog post ‘The (Not Big or Fat) Quiz of the Year.

Let’s begin

 

What was your highlight of 2016?
My highlight of 2016 has to be seeing Max interacting well with friends. I was seriously worrying about how he behaves in social situations the last year, but attending clubs and having quiet words with him seems to be doing the trick. I’m hoping it’ll only get better from here!

 

Name one thing you are most likely to remember about 2016 if asked in five years time?
Trump. Still cannot believe it.

 

Sum up 2016 in one word.
Unpredictable

  • No one would have believed that trump had a chance of winning, yet here we are.
  • Leons behaviour went from calm, collected and content, to very aggressive and violent so unpredictable is very suiting.
  • I wouldn’t have predicted a complete change of heart when it came to educationI must say it’s definitely not a bad thing, I’ve learned not to take things for granted due to the unpredictability of 2016. Plus.. if Trump can win presidency then that should in some messed up way inspire us all to aim for whatever, even if we’re ridiculously under qualified or out of our comfort zone.

 

Name one pearl of wisdom from 2016 that you will carry with you through 2017.
Let go of the small things. If you won’t remember it in five years time, there’s little use in losing sleep over it now.

 

Do you have any new year resolutions?
Absolutely, you can read about them here.

 

How are you seeing in the new year?
I saw it consoling the dogs. They hate the fireworks!

 

What would you most like to do in 2017?
Mostly, lose weight. So I am more comfortable in myself and more confident.
Secondly, be more content that I’m doing the right thing for the boys.. that’s a long and forever winding road though.

 

What are your main goals for 2017?

  • I want to lose 2-3lbs a week.
  • To begin blogging consistently – at least once a week averagely.
  • Completely declutter the house
  • Explore more

Goals for the New Year

 

I am struggling to comprehend that 2017 is already here, the last year has gone by so fast! I’m glad it’s here though, 2016 has been such a weird year. There’s been so many celebrity deaths, the refugee crisis, politics. Trump. Need I say more?
I wanted to write down my goals for this year, so I can try stick to them. They always seems a little bit more set in stone when they’re written down, don’t you think?

 

Main Focus

 

Lose Weight

I along with many others set this goal every year and fail to do it. As cliche as it sounds, I’m feeling positive about it this year, a change in the wind.  A post will follow with my weight loss plan.

 

Blogging

 

Most of this year, my blogging focus has been on aesthetics and going self hosted. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret it. I love how my blog looks and I’m much more settled with self hosted WordPress than I was any other platform. I wouldn’t change it. Only issue being this all took time. Time that took my focus away from creating blog content, so for that reason this year the focus will be on content.

 

 

Declutter

 

Marie Kondo! I have began reading “the life changing magic of tidying” by Marie Kondo. Who reads about tidying?! Me. Along with many others – it’s a well written book that changes your mindset on hoarding. Teaching you to love everything you own and the things you don’t love so much, that serve no purpose have little place in your life. I’ve not finished the book but I plan to go through all my belongings with this in mind and declutter my home.

 

 

Explore

 

I live in Falkirk. A beautiful town. It’s close to two amazing cities full of culture, museums and places the kids will love. I want to make more of an effort to find places to go and actually go there. I tend to rely on recommendations but I want to research my own places to visit.

 

 

 

Goals I’ll at least think about

from time to time

 

Social

 

If you’ve read previous posts, you’ll know I struggle with anxiety. I’ve not spoken to the Doctor about it so it’s unmedicated but I do have quite bad bouts of it. I hate speaking on the phone, I used to get my mother to phone everyone on my behalf. Also hated going shopping, did most of it online, I didn’t take the kids anywhere. This has improved loads. I feel more comfortable after I’ve forced myself into these situations. (not beforehand yet) but I think if I continue with this in mind, one day I’ll realise I have nothing to worry about.. (that’s the hope at least.) I want to go to some things just for me as well as things for the kids.

 

 

Create

 

I’m not all that fussed about this one. I love doing creative things – it’s calming, keeps me in my zone. Firstly, crafts. I do want to take the time to make do and mend a few things I own rather than replacing them with shiny new ones. I want to create things for the wall instead of buying them. I’ve never took the time to create the way I want to. I’ve just done the “in thing”. Alongside the thing I should do according to college lecturers or what I should do according to ‘advance your art’ guides. If I research the art I like, I’ll be quite happy at that. If I begin practicing it then that’ll be a bonus.

 

 

Save


I have to admit.. with money and budgeting I manage well but I do not save. I know what I have to spend, I know what’s due to come out of the bank soon. I’ve never made the conscious effort to save for anything other than expensive purchases. I want to begin saving for the sake of saving. One main saving goal is to save enough for a comfortable Disneyland trip next year (2018.) Also because of my anxiety, I’d like to have a fair amount saved on top too incase of emergencies. It’s also good to have savings so I’m not in dire straits if anything breaks down at home which is another reason saving is one of my goals for the year.

 

This is my round up for this year. What are you goals for this year? Hopefully this time next year I’ll have already posted about how well I’ve done 😉 
x

Looking back at 2016 : goal review

Looking back at 2016: goal review

 

This year has been a rollercoaster of emotions, aren’t they all though? I warn you – this is a wall of text. Stressed would be my word to describe this year, although I think it comes with the territory of being a single parent. Feeling stressed, with the added stress of not looking stressed, so you don’t stress the kids. What a Palaver.

Last Years Goals.

Last year I done a post “Goals for 2016” My plan for the year ahead. There were a few goals I had and I’ll go over them.

Firstly – twitter. I wanted to figure out how to use it. Considering you’ll find me here with 156 tweets and counting and just under 460 followers I think I’ve got it down.

Secondly –  Get healthier. Well does mentally count? I’ve lost about 20 lbs. I could lose a lot more though, 20 lbs is better than nothing! I still don’t have the whole “drink more water” thing down. It’s so bland, but I know it’s something you become accustomed to you just have to keep at it. (I will, I will!)

Thirdly – Selfcare. I wanted to be selfish by keeping my skin healthy, to make time for moisturising and doing hair and makeup daily instead of – and I quote “looking like an extra from the walking dead”. I kinda sucked with this one. Moisturising is on the up, as is using my fancy liquid exfoliater serum stuff, so my face skin has improved lots. But it’s definitely far from a routine.

Fourthly – Be more Social. Ok well, I’ve went to Every thing they held at the school. Every coffee morning, every shared learning opportunity. I’ve took the kids to museums. I’ve visited people. I’ve had people over for dinner. I’ve been out and about.. Kinda. I could definitely do more and make more of an effort to do things that aren’t planned weeks in advance (I’m such a hermit and it IS difficult, thanks anxiety!) but I hope to improve more the coming year.

Fifthly – Cooking. Well this year, I went and got myself a freaking instant pot pressure cooker. (A freaking pressure cooker!) My mum doesn’t even have one I feel so old. My god this thing is the holy grail of quick cooking. It’s like home made microwave meals, it’s fab. I can’t recommend it enough. I’ve also dabbled with “bulk cooking” or meal prep as it’s more known as on instgram (Check out the #mealprep tag on there!). Which is basically batch cooking your meals for the week portioning them out and freezing or storing in a fridge, and reheating. Not the greatest, but as a single parent with very limited free time I’m more than willing to give up the freshness of a freshly cooked meal in exchange for 5 days worth of “slaving over a cookertop” time. As a bonus – I can measure all ingrediants and calories for the whole meal and divide it by number of servings for the week when I’m calorie counting. Win win! I’ve not quite got this down yet, but I’m more than confident that with a bit more effort this year I’ll be giving Mister Ramsey a run for his money.

Sixthly – (why did I write so many of these?!) Arts and crafts. I wanted to practice my own art and make crafts. I didn’t really get round to it as I was more focussed on getting a portfolio ready for college this year (which was a cesspool of shit as they messed up the course – but I do not regret missing a year)

Seventhly – (when will these end?!) Stop wasting food.  Uh what? Why did I write this. I don’t recall wasting food. Perhaps a bit takeaway friendly. I’ve no idea. I do often through out yogurts and things that have not been eaten perhaps that’s what I meant. Bad ol’ me!

EIGHTHLY – (Is eighthly even a word?) Blogging. Well. What a year it’s been. I’m finally happy with my blog. It’s self hosted after way too fucking many failed attempts at doing it. I had a fabulous illustration (see the header!) created by the lovely Emma of Daydreams and ice creams (you’ll find them on Facebook) And I just love the layout. I love the theme. I love how it works. I love using wordpress on a self hosted basis. I will continue to produce more content and more frequently than I have been (my downfall!) but overall I’m happy with the progress I’ve made this year. And hopefully next year will involve me focussing on content alone rather than dreaming of better layouts and cute headers.

and FINALLY (or Ninthly for you pedants who like order 😉 ) – Declutter. Holy shit, this went in reverse this year. I’ve become more cluttered. I purchased Marie Kondos “the life changing magic of tidying” ages ago, but holy fuck I’ve not even got round to reading the whole book yet.  Although I must admit what I have read has made perfect sense, I want to read the rest and do it room by room. I’ve also got “spark joy” and the miracle morning to read… maybe reading those books will be in my “fucking do this in 2017 you procrastinating maw bag” list.

What I got out of 2016.

2016 is the year I learned to let go of the little shit (and I don’t mean my child) I mean, stop stressing about the house not being top notch decorated, it can be done later. The washing can be folded tomorrow. Stop stressing that your kid only ate chicken dippers and Walkers cheese and onion square crisps for the last week.. at least he’s eating something.  Stop stressing that you haven’t bathed the dogs in forever, they really don’t give a shit and are actually clean, you’re just a fucking numpty and slightly OCD about it. Admittedly this came later in the year, probably the last few months. I’ve had paper and paint sitting to decorate my bedroom and been able to leave it in a cupboard. So yeah, this time last year I wouldn’t have done that I’d be up painting till the small hours, then survive on minimal sleep, but I’ve learned it’s okay.. Or more I’ve accepted it’s okay.

I’ve had a year off college, and thought a lot about the future. I’m still thinking a lot about the future. I took a year of because I wasn’t sure just where I’d go with my course – I love art, and I want to do some kind of community art thing.. But do I really need an art degree for that? Any employment would be unlikely to work around caring full time for an adult which Leon will be eventually. Are all these years of studying and working beneficial in the long run vs me being at home for Leon. Who knows what it holds? Leon is and will forever be a very dependant child, and he will grow into a dependant adult. He is strong now, and will only get stronger. I’ve only just accepted that he might not have kids, he might not live independently at all. He will always need me.  He might never speak. But now, because of his recent bouts of aggression I’m wondering just whether I can provide what he needs by myself. I’ve accepted I may need respite care for him in the future, so me and Max can have a break and recharge and do normal everyday things. In the long run though, I don’t know how it’ll advance. I hope his aggression calms down, so we can get on with things and help him advance a little bit. So right now, college isn’t particularly a priority. I’d love to go back this year in June, but I don’t have time right now to blow my nose around Leon let alone produce a portfolio of work for an interview. So yeah, currently I’m not likely to be a student in the near future and that’s okay. I’ve accepted that and I’m not going to sweat it. My kids come first, always.

I’ve stopped allowing people to walk over me. I’m a very generous person, generous in the sense I’d do anything for anyone without batting an eyelid. I don’t do it so I get something in return I do it because I’m a nice person, and as much as I act like a bitch 90% the time it’s just my sarcastic personality, I’m god-awfully-fucking- lovely. But I also do the whole generous with my time thing on my terms now. I don’t allow people to guilt trip me into doing things and no most definitely means no.

 

I’ve stopped letting family squabbles bother me. Around July of 2015 I fell out with my grandmother, or more she fell out with me because I was upset over her not acknowledging her grandchildren’s birthday (Whilst the other grandchildren were spoiled well in advance for their birthdays my two hadn’t so much as received a card and their birthday passed!) I have a mouth, and I use it. My gran didn’t like it. My aunt and cousin have taken advantage of my gran ever since my grandpa died, it was difficult enough to witness them taking advantage of her and I mentioned this too. Us being the only family who actually do things out of goodwill rather than guilt / because we’re getting her fucking pension. So yeah, We’ve not spoke since. You know what? It’s fucking okay. I’m not willing to be around family members who don’t appreciate my kids. I witnessed favouritism when I was a child from the same woman, and I won’t allow it around my kids. My aunt and cousin are only willing to partake in any family when they benefit from it financially. My cousin dropped her very close own godmother and had to be taken to court to pay money back she borrowed. So yeah, I’m more than happy to disown them and if I never seen them again I’d be quite happy with that. I no longer feel as though I haven’t tried or as though I’m responsible for not mending the relationship as I don’t feel as though there would even be one to go back to. There’s only so much nonsense and vileness you can take from people who are supposed to be family. So yeah, this year I’ve stopped questioning my judgement and accepted that I’m 100% allowed to terminate my relationship with toxic family members without feeling guilty.

As for the kids, this year Leon got his wheelchair – what a difference! Meltdowns in busy places are much less likely to happen when he’s in it. We’ve been going to their kids club and they’ve made friends out of school. I can only hope things get better. Max is growing into a very independant and caring young man. He’s so kind and thoughtful sometimes. It’s adorable, melts my heart but then he farts in the bath and goes into hysterics over it – especially when there’s bubbles .. so it evens itself out a bit.

Overall 2016 has been a pleasure.
Here’s to 2017.

P.S If you’ve made it to the end of this, give yourself a pat on the back. What a load of tripe you have just gotten through, well done! 

Happy New Year everyone,
All the best to you and yours.

<3 x